Welcome! Come on in! Wipe your feet but leave your shoes on...I haven't scrubbed the floor in a LOOOOOONG time. Oh, don't sit there...there's peanut butter smashed into that cushion. Can I get you something to drink? Oh, we don't have any cups clean. Shoot. You don't mind warm pop do you? Straight from the can? We don't have any ice right now either...
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